Ep. 86: The NO We Should Be Saying More

A lot of my clients have this expectation that in long-term, committed relationships, there is less pressure when it comes to sex, but oftentimes, there’s even more pressure, and it can be difficult to say no when we really should. Today I really want to talk with you more about saying no, using this word, stopping sex and when this is important for you and your pleasure, and also why it’s so damn hard to do. I’m not even going to pretend that it’s not, because it is really tricky, but it’s important to remember why we’re doing this and that it’s just one more way to keep becoming a fully turned on woman living a pleasured life.

I also want to say thank you to those who have taken the time to write a review on Apple Podcasts. If you haven’t yet, please write a review and take a screenshot and send it to [email protected] for your Sensational Sex starter kit! I’ve put together some meditations, instructional videos, and the things you need to help you get started on this journey. All submissions are entered to win a giveaway with one lucky winner who will receive a box with so much good stuff in there to nourish you, nourish your soul, and be able to bring pleasure into your life. 

Topics in this episode: 

• Saying no creates boundaries and safety.
• No can work against you when it’s the only thing that you say
• The ultimate outcome is to shift your mind to connect with yourself and your partner in a way that you are experiencing more pleasure
• Creating a container that is inviting for pleasure
• The body needs safety and a lack of pressure
• The disconnect between what we know cognitively, and what we feel in our bodies
• Reasons why we’re afraid to say no
• Addressing the idea that it is our job and responsibility to prioritize the pleasure of others

As always, it’s been my absolute pleasure to share this information with you about stopping sex and why it’s so hard to say no. Remember, there is no room for pleasure when you don’t give yourself the permission to say no. It’s crucial that you feel that it’s ok. Saying no is scary sometimes, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do it. I hope this episode helps you create more safety in your body so that pleasure and desire can grow. In the next episode, I’ll be talking about when you shouldn’t say no, and why these are both important.